England, 8th March 2021 – Lockdown is Lifting

I  wonder …

With pupils returning to school today, another new phase has started and it is one that I have been thinking about for some time but have not really prepared myself for in the way that I would have liked.  

It has arrived though and I have that nagging voice telling me that ‘by this stage I should have ….” or “if only I had done this … or done that”.   I am feeling unaccomplished and I am wanting to just ‘cocoon’ again as in so many ways it feels much easier.  But, I also know that my concerns are actually not ‘real’ and I also know that the ruminations going on in my mind are habitual and can be challenged! 

And I suspect that my own concerns are not dissimilar to how many are feeling.   We have become familiar with our lives in lock down.  The boundaries of the daily routines has a rhythm of it’s own and I actually think, a form of security about it and so, in order to help myself move into this chapter, I am putting into practice a few of the ‘tools’ that are helpful to me.

When I hear the voices of ‘if only I had…’, or ‘I should have accomplished this or that by now …’, or ‘I am just not ready …’,  I will remind myself to actively become present, remind myself of what I have accomplished and to carefully choose a more encouraging, kinder and inspiring narrative:

I know that I will figure this out …

I know that I have what I need for today …

I am expecting good things to happen today …

I can do this … 

The very useful and powerful phrase that I like to use lies  in the two words, ‘I wonder …’.   These couple of words opens my mind to other possibilities and I can almost feel my mind stretching to try out new potential outcomes.  ‘I wonder’ gives me the calmness to just keep going and dissolves the fears that I have around how I think things will be like and brings me back into the present.  

Do try this and I hope that you find it very useful.